Pantang Larang Seorang Jejaka Bernama Lelaki

Salam sejahtera buat semua.

Kesayangan Lelaki

Pantang larang ni bukan sembarangan. Bukan juga pantang larang seorang lelaki semasa mengandung. Tak kisahlah mana-mana jejaka pun. Yang penting bukan jejaka terlampau. Jejaka tampan boleh la kot. ūüėÄ

Saya dapat benda ni daripada Bro Edi. Nak tergelak baca entri tu. Tapi dalam omputih la. Men’s rules! Sekali tengok kat bawah entri tu ada ayat bagi kebenaran untuk disebar, apa lagi sambar aja la.

Jom layan satu persatu. Baca dan gelak~

Men’s Rules!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up,¬† you need it down. You don’t hear us complaining¬† about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday = Sports. It’s like the full¬† moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are  never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is act of terrorism and we do not  negotiate with terrorists.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say  what you mean! If you think that we know that you mean YES when you say NO, you are damn wrong.
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. No need to¬† elaborate ! We are sick hearing the ‘WHY‘ question even after we give the answer.
1. Come to us with a problem only the one that you can’t solve. Try solving the simple shit things by yerself. You’re a big babe!! not big baby!!
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a  problem. See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is  inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments  become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won’t dress like the Victoria’s¬† Secret girls, don’t expect us to act like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you’re fat, you probably¬† are!! Don’t ask us that silly question.
1. If something we said can be interpreted in two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other way.
1. You can either ask us to do something or  tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself!!
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever  you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like  Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say¬† “nothing,” we will act like nothing’s wrong. We¬† know you are lying, but it is just not worth the¬† hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don’t want us¬† to answer, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine… Really.
1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about¬† unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as¬† football, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1.You are in shape. Round is a shape.
1. Thank you for reading this: Yes, I¬† know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did¬† you know men really don’t mind that, it’s like¬† camping.

*****

beliamuda: Kenapa semua nombor 1? Bukan tak sengaja, tapi sengaja dibuat. Kalau ada yang tak paham tu, buat-buat paham je la. (^_~)v

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